Vacation, vacate.

Ohh, life. If there is one thing I've learned, it's that gut feelings are never wrong. At least they haven't been wrong, yet. Maybe that's why I rely so much on my emotions and have been known to push logic aside. Eh. Makes life interesting, I suppose.

I skipped out on a free Steel Train concert tonight. Mainly because it was pouring down rain, but also because I couldn't find anyone to go with. And, I mean, as much fun as wandering into a crowd of indie fans/campus estate residents in the pouring rain sounded, I figured I'd wait for my next free Steel Train concert opp to come around. Ho well. Instead I decided to sit at home and eat popcorn chicken and create a new blog. That's just what I needed, ya know. A new blog. I'll probably post one entry and then forget about it. Eh. Today was actually a really good day when I look back on it. I made the easiest 60 bucks of my life working from 2-8 and then just relaxed. Relaxing is nice. I talked to J on the phone for an hour. I've kind of forgotten that, yeah... he's one of the few people in my life that I can actually talk to. It was good. He actually posted a few insightful entries about relationships here that I enjoyed reading.

It's so crazy how things haven't changed one bit. Not really. It's like I got home yesterday from a year long vacation and everything was exactly how I'd left it. The only thing that's really different is my place of residence and my newfound goals and desires. But other than that, it's all the same. I'm talking to the same people as if we'd never stopped. I'm making the same plans and looking forward to the same things- only this time, it's nice to just not care. I don't know what I was so afraid of last August, but this has been so nice. It's like I've been holding my breath for 7 months and I finally exhaled. What a relief.

Man, there are so many things that I'm excited about doing. I'm ready to unleash my creativity in every way possible. As in, like, I'm gonna start knitting/sewing/crocheting. Fun! And I'm going to actually put this recording equipment to USE. I have played my guitar more in the past week than in the past 6 months. In the past I couldn't go a single day. My fingers are numb as they hit the keypad of my laptop and it is SUCH an amazing feeling. The current song I'm working on is one that I started last October. I only wrote half of it and now I have the pleasant task of conquering the second half. It's somewhat difficult since it's a, heh, love song... but I always enjoy a challenge. I have forgotten how much I love being nocturnal. And my taste in music! I can't believe I ever let anyone make me feel wrong about being myself. And it's truly no one's mistake but my own.

I am that girl who will stay up until 5 a.m. playing the same verse of a song over and over again. I will always prefer an adventure to a dull night indoors. I will never stop being so damn sentimental and will always need romance in my life. Railroad tracks and midnight visits to the park will always top getting dressed up and getting trashed. At least that's how things are for now. At least that's how things should be. I enjoy making memories. And that's all OKAY. I'm not wrong for letting my emotions guide my decisions. I'm not wrong for not having everything figured out. I'm not wrong for disliking most of what I hear on the radio. I'm not wrong being a picky eater. I'm not wrong for hating Halo 2. I'm not wrong at all.

It's just time to be myself again.